Anthony Weiner’s penis to run for City council

The penis in there is wearing a tiny suit with an American flag lapel pin.

The penis in there is wearing a tiny suit with an American flag lapel pin.

With all the expose it’s been getting and it’s owner’s poll numbers dwindling, disgraced numbskull politician Anthony Weiner’s penis has announced its intentions to seek a position on the New York City Council.

“I definitely think he’s got a great shot. He’s doing very well polling,” claims the penis’s chief of staff. Currently the penis, running as a member of the Green Party, is nearly neck-in-neck with incumbent Republican Leslie Swisher.

Mister Weiner’s penis goes to City Hall!

Owner Anthony Weiner (also known as “Carlos Danger” – mega points for that pseudonym, bro) has been supportive of his penis’s new ambitions. “My penis is by the people, and for the people. It’s highly motivated, and takes a hard stance on the issues he’s passionate about. He also really enjoys anal.” We assume he means giving.

A media campaign is set for Tuesday via picture texts.

Bennet Vindushali

Bennet Vindushali

If you're reading this, I'm probably dancing in an American flag thong. Or, I'm reporting vital information in an American flag thong. - Author's Full Bio

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