Barney the Dinosaur Stalked by Insane Taxidermist

Barney in happier times

A 42 year old man his helping police with their enquiries after it was alleged he had stalked children’s entertainer ‘Barney the Dinosaur’ for three years.

Chris Myers from Reno is believed to suffer from a rare condition wich compells him to stuff and mount full body puppets in order to obtain sexual gratification.

The condition is so peculiar that even the man who discovered it refuses to have his name associated with it. Thankfully it is comparatively rare.

Mr Myers made several attempts to kidnap Barney after shows and at the studio. On one occasion Barney was forced to into a van but fought his way out using tools he found inside.

These revelations seem all the more shocking because little is known about Barney’s personal life. ‘When he’s not at the show he just slips on a hoodie and blends into the crowd,’ said his agent.

It is known that the seven foot pink dinosaur recently parted company with a robot veloceraptor called Marcie whom he bought from London’s Natural History Museum.

Mr Myers is expected to be charged later today. In the meantime Barney has filed a restraining order against the man who is also facing questions about incidents dating back to the early 1980’s involving both Big Bird and Snuffleupagus!

Posted by on January 18, 2013. Filed under Haddock Culture, Haddock US. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.