Bernard Manning’s Ghost has ‘Chinned’ Jimmy Saville’s Ghost!

The ghost of LAMDA trained, middle class stand up comedian Bernard Manning was so appalled at the posthumous scandal of Savile and his part time predator conduct that he punched Savile’s ghost, claims medium.

bernard manning chins Jimmy SavilleManning, after several pints of Mckewan’s Export, decided to pay Savile’s ghost a visit. Without saying so much as a hello, the lumbering Mancunian belted Savile so hard that it ripped his ghostly tracksuit.

The medium, Colin Watersalad, heard the comotion whilst trying to contact somebody’s stepbrother for a hefty fee. Blakedrake told The Haddock:

I recognised the two straight away, there was no jingle jangle catchphrases; just a scuffle followed by some violent swearing.

Watersalad couldn’t get through to the dead version of the police. The two had never met alive, not even for charity event. Blakedrake heard Manning muttering as he walked away: I knew there was something queer about that bastard.

The medium’s claims, however, have not been taken seriously. Watersalad was fired from Sky Quest last year. He is to stand accused of conning a broadcaster out of their millions for claiming to get in touch with Michael Barrymore and Christopher Timothy, who have been proved to be still alive.