Bravo Manufacturing has issued a mass recall of cat food products across the United States, even though the products are considered to be 100% safe for animal consumption. The issue as hand is over the labeling of the products. On Friday, a spokesperson for the company issued the following statement:
“We at Bravo offer our sincerest apologies for using images of genetically modified cats and kittens on select lines of our dry and wet products. Though the food contained in these packages is complete safe to consume, we feel it is still best to recall the offending packages so we don’t have to face the wrath of those engaged in a formal jihad against Monsanto.”
It is believed that the genetically modified animals were used to entice customers. Images include cats that can glow in the dark, cats that can control the weather, and cats that have won the Sy Sims award for outstanding feline business comprehension. The affect that these cats have had on product sales is currently not yet known.
Uproar has cropped up amongst uptight cat owners over the news. “I cannot believe they would do this,” snarks Sheila Frank, clutching her long-haired Persian Mr. Fluffles. “I don’t care that the food was safe! I don’t want to see cats that can fly on Mr. Fluffles dinner! How do you think that would make him feel, knowing that he can’t fly?!”
The Bravo spokesperson went on to reiterate the company’s commitment to safety: “We want to make sure everyone is completely clear; our products are not dangerous. We’ve got the same amount of horse, turtle, aardvark, and crocodile meat as we’ve ever had. The choice to genetically modify our promotional felines was an unfortunate one, and we promise it will never happen again. Or rather that it will only happen again once the concept of genetically modified animals is considered commonplace and is totally acceptable socially.”