The CEO of Backward Technolgies, a firm making tools, vehicles and household goods out of recycled materials has found himself in hot water today after a series of accidents involving his products. Two men were seriously injured in Bromley after their ladder made from recycled cabbage dissolved during heavy rain leaving them stranded on top of an eighty foot fibre glass brontosaurs from which they promptly fell. In Thamesmead the fire department had a lucky escape when their cardboard fire truck was accidentally reduced to a pile of ashes during a training exercise. Backward Technologies have already been severely reprimanded by the Government records office after selling disposable birth certificates and are involved in a legal dispute with the NHS over a batch of soluble pacemakers. As a result of this disaster their chief inventor; Doctor Brian Salad has been summarily ejected from the premises and ordered not to contact them again. Professor Salad has vowed to return with a collection of new inventions with which he intends to save the world. Having interviewed him the Haddock have decided to offer the old man a weekly column in the paper describing his progress, ideas and cock ups!