David Walliams Pledges to Swim Circumference of Fictional Ocean Planet

Fresh from his triumphant Sport Relief swim along the River Thames, television funny man David Walliams has outlined his next big charity stunt; Swimming the entire circumference of the fictional ocean planet in which the invading aliens from cult movie The Faculty live.

Walliams, whose swim for Sport Relief took him from Teddington Lock to Westminster, said he was very excited about this new challenge. “Obviously there is the issue of parasitic aliens swimming into my ears and taking over my mind and body, but I had to avoid old black plastic bags, beer cans and drowned rats in the Thames, so it should be no problem, really. I hear it’s a breathtakingly beautiful planet with the clearest of water, and to be the first to swim the circumference will be an honour.

But Walliams’s manager, Martin Igresavic, was skeptical about whether the challenge would realistically go ahead. “First of all, the name of the planet is unfortunately not mentioned in the film, so finding it is going to be tricky. David has taken to calling it ‘the big blue naughty’ so we’ll stick with that for a while.