Dish Network, the set top box which mercifully cuts out all the fun-destroying commercials allowing you to watch your show from start to finish uninterrupted are facing legal action from the big networks.
Fox, CBS and NBC are suing the company because commercials are their main source of income and if nobody watches them they’re screwed.
“We’ll have to make live shows that people actually want to watch!” said a spokesperson from Fox. “Engaging shows, less montages and more content…it’s just not fair.”
“We’re going to shout ‘Go to commercial,’ every five minutes anyway just to ruin the experience for you TV killers!” Screamed an un-named source who may once have been a prop at the Jay Leno show.
It’s true that live television could be the only way they can save their asses if Dish Network have their way … after all, should we be forced to watch commercials?
Reality TV doesn’t really work if you record it and watch it later … so more of that crap might be the answer, but they’re becoming less and less popular as even the hard core fans have to admit they’re complete garbage.
The networks are believed to be ganging together and forcing the government to pass legislation which would make it illegal to have a TV with a flat top.
Special curved TV hoods would be sent out to all households, each designed in such a way that a set top box would simply fall off and smash!
Another idea came from a British designer who suggested installing spring loaded steel spikes inside TV sets which would shoot up and demolish the set top box should the viewers choose to try and record certain advertisement rich content on a Dish Network box.
There’s no denying that everybody hates commercials and it should be a basic human right to enjoy a TV program for its content and quality rather than have it diluted by fifty unwanted messages which ultimately degrade the efforts of the actors and presenters.