A fossilised Triceratops which has lain in the soil of South Dakota for over 1oo million years has yielded perhaps the most bizarre archaeological discovery of all time.
“Tutankhamun was a surprise, Pompeii was a real eye-opener but this…this is not just unusual, it’s disturbing at a level that most people are ashamed to admit their mind can function!” Said Dr Barnaby Yates of the team which discovered the find.
When the petrified remains were lifted from the soil one of the interns noticed a ‘little rusty bit’ between the animals legs.
On closer inspection it was discovered that the Triceratops was female and that her vaginal cavity had been preserved in eye-watering detail, but even this couldn’t prepare them for what they found next.
“Then one of the team, a complete stoner called Seth shouts out ‘Dude, she’s got a pierced clit!’ and we all fell around laughing. But he was right!” Said Dr Yates. “It wasn’t some accident, there was a metal ring right through it’s clitoris, we were just flabbergasted!”
Seven independent experts have studied the data and confirmed the findings to be correct.
This is the first genuine case of a dinosaur with a genital ring.
You may remember last year a team claimed to have found a tyrannosaur with a Prince Albert but this was later proved to be a fake and the infamous case of the tattooed diplodocus has recently gone to appeal at the European Court.
The idea that dinosaurs were clever enough to fashion genital rings or in fact that they should want to threatens to turn our understanding of natural history and everything else on its head.
The last word has to go to Seth the stoner who when asked about it had his own theory.
“Aliens man, they came down here, they found giant lizards and they started messing with their toilet parts…it happens all the fucking time man, aliens are sick as hell!” he explained.