Italy goes skeleton prodding to track down Mona Lisa!

Italy is a land of many secrets. Pasta; how did it become flat? Political parties; are they grown in cloning laboratories? The Vatican; what goes on in there then?

Italian scientists are attempting to bring one of those mysteries from darkness to light. Their process involves sifting through a number of skeletons and occasionally prodding a few of them with stun sticks.

Mona Lisa Overdrive!

The genealogical prodding specialists believe to have located the tomb of the woman suspected of Mona Lisa-ing. They soon plan on prying open the doors, scan the remains of the occupants, and if necessary, use non-lethal force should the skeletons become violent.

“We are trained in the most advanced techniques in suppressing skeletal opposition,” claims the team’s head researcher. “We learned all of our techniques from police in the United States; they’re so good at it, they’ve gotten skeletons confess to manslaughter charges!”

The success of these tests are remains to be seen. When asked why this task is of any importance as the country’s financial state continues collapsing, an assistant researcher responded:

“It is important because she was a woman. A woman, who was painted.”

Bernard Floater

Bernard Floater

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Bernard Floater Posted by on August 15, 2013. Filed under Haddock Culture, Haddock Science, Haddock World. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.