Britain’s newest Superhero; Hi-Vis man has been shot and killed in his very first battle with evil villains. Eye-witnesses at the scene said the misguided crime-fighter seemed unable to hide from the bullets on account of his glowing phosphorescent lycra suit which can be seen from space .
His death is just the latest in a series of B-list superhero executions in which other names such as ‘Very-Loud’ Guy, ‘The Pogo Avenger’ and ‘Run-backwards Girl’ have met a similar fate.
It seems that superpowers are not always a good thing. Comic nerd Gareth Beige explains.
“We only read about the cool powers in comics, but superpowers are a mutation and they’re not always a help! There was a guy in Costa Rica who’s legs and arms swapped places when his powers kicked in … he didn’t stand a chance!”
Hi-Vis man is survived by his two cats, a half-built robot partner which doesn’t work and a spider called jake, all of whom are said to be utterly indifferent to the news.
As to who will take over Hi-Vis man’s beat, well there are already rumours of a new caped-crusader called No-Immune System Man who has been seen in the area driving a tin-foil lined, sterile perspex bubble-car.
Thank goodness … now we can all sleep safely in our beds!