One fifth of One Direction Harry Styles is in hiding today after a shocking video of his 19th birthday was released showing him ‘miming’ his own Birthday Song… oh yeah and there was some police woman stripper thing too…BUT HE MIMED!
Just as Beyonce put the whole ‘miming at Obma’s Inauguration’ thing to bed by singing the song live to a audience of people who’d much rather just watch her have a bath, this has to go and happen!
Styles, who’s real name is Harry Styles, was contractually obliged not to turn 19 in the first place and as a result is expected to shave his head and apologise on Youtube later.
Miming is a serious crime in the music industry because, although many people are unaware of it, music is a sound and sounds cannot be mimed…or you can’t hear them. [FACTOID]
When his manager realised what Harry had done he quickly tried to cover up the scandal by bringing in a woman dressed as a police officer who promptly undressed and bounced on his lap for the camera.
“If all goes well, that’ll be the story!” Said one source close to Harry… it may even have been the stripper.
We later discovered that the stripper was not a stripper at all, and Harry Styles may not even have been himself but a clever electronic doll.
Whatever the case, Mime-Gate just got worse.
Haddock reporters heard recently that apparently George Osborne mimed his budget speech, but this was later proven wrong as they couldn’t find an actor prepared to stoop to those depths.