Condomsending! Verbal Abuse Condoms!

Having problems breaking up with an unwanted partner? Time to bring that difficult relationship to an end but you just can’t say it? The answer maybe at hand. Vending machines in Gents toilets all over Britain will soon be selling condoms which insult your partner. X F*cKter condoms have a tiny built in chip and microphone, much like those found in greetings cards. Before, during and after sex these talking sheaths will bombard your female or male partner with recordings of Simon Cowell insulting hopeless wannabe singers on his show. Just imagine how your soon-to-be ex would feel when, during the throes of your love-making a voice suddenly says “Shave off your beard and wear a dress. I think you’d be a great female impersonator” or “You were having fun. I’m not sure how much fun everyone at home was having.” or even “You have just invented a new form of torture.” Needless to say they’ll dump you on the spot. Job done!

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Posted by on February 16, 2011. Filed under Haddock Culture, Haddock Science. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry

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