Every man in the Caribbean island nation of Barbados is walking around with one hand in pocket and a smile on his face. In a press conference this morning, legendary kiss-and-tell songstress Taylor Swift has announced that in order to cull inspiration for her next hit record, she will be traveling to Barbados and “dating” every eligible man on the island.
As her first record was about one boy and her second was about three, exponential male influence would appear to be an obvious trend in Swift’s creative process. Tackling an entire country, on the other hand; what a trooper!
In the press conference, Taylor was quoted as saying that she’d “always wanted to expand her ‘dating’ horizons,” and had always felt that Barbados “had a lot to offer. Like…a LOT…”
Indeed, Ms. Swift is correct: of the nearly 300,000 people that populate the country, a great deal of them are men. Mere hours after the press conference, initial polling data showed that off those numerous males, 100% of them considered themselves fit to “date” Taylor Swift.
The affect the experiment will have on Swift’s music remains to be seen. Though few details have been released, a member of the performer’s publicity staff was overheard saying of the project: “It’s going to be like Taylor’s ‘We Are the World.’ It’ll be like, ‘We Are Barbados…and Most of Us Under 70 Years of Age Spent a Little Time with Taylor Swift.’”
Male residents of the island are eager to learn more about Ms. Swift’s plans in their country. Specifically, if she enjoys anal dating.