Tony Blair Gets Stoned

Following on from The Haddock’s exclusive (insert link) that Charles Bronson is working on security for the Rolling Stones, another celebrity name has now become involved.

Ex prime minister, Tony Blair, has joined the band as lead guitarist.  Blair said that “After running the country everyday, there’s naff all to do once you step down.  I watched the film Point Break one night and toyed with getting together with Gordon, Maggie and John Major to form a group of daring bankrobbers, like the ex-Presidents, but none of the others had the bottle to do it.    

So I decided to dust down my Fender Stratocaster and really started practising. After reading the recent story in The Haddock I sent The Stones an email. They gave me an audition to see if I could cut the mustard with red hot guitar licks and before I knew it I was on tour with them.

Keith Richards said “I didn’t really dig all that Iraq shit, but man, this Blair cat can really play.  We’ve had loads of axe men dudes in the band over the years, Brian Jones, Mick Taylor and Ronnie Wood but this Blair daddio is the best.  He added “Have you got any fags?â€