In a change to the published version of events, there is new evidence that the real reason we are unable to see photo’s of Osama Bin Laden’s body is that the over excited soldiers who found and killed him had a ‘hog roast’ to celebrate.
However, in respect of the Muslim population they were unable to eat a pig so they did the next best thing and ate the Al Quaeda leader instead.
Apparently he was a ‘a bit wiry’ and had a ‘peculiar after taste’ but doused in standard US army ration ketchup he was just the ticket for a group of hungry commandos who had been working the late shift.
However, when the call finally came from President Obama to congratulate the men there was an almighty ‘Ooops!’ moment when he asked to see the body.
The team rapidly collected together what they could find; a few spare ribs, a wing, some organs … but the resulting photo wasn’t a convincing likeness.
Particularly since Corporal ‘Dumptruck’ Daily ate the man’s head, bones, beard and all in one mouthful and washed it down with a litre of goats milk!
Needless to say the resulting photo cannot be released for obvious reasons.