Weapons of Mess Destruction

Kentucky: Two competing vacuum cleaner manufacturers have failed in their attempt to settle their differences by dual. The two men had to be pulled apart by police as they tried to kill one another with cutting edge carpet cleaning equipment. Despite the massive suction power unleashed during the confrontation, neither man was able to achieve a clean kill. It is believed that a number of woodland animals met their ends during the fight. When the dust bag of one machine was emptied it was found to contain the remains of twenty-five squirrels, a family of bats and a Reticulated Python called George. The other bag had a horse in it. Both men have been charged for making a sucking nuisance of themselves!