We’ve Got that Loving Ceiling!

For the first time this century, the ceiling to floor ratio has fallen to an all time low. There are now only ten times as many floors as ceilings. The ratio, been recorded as a category 7 event on the ARTEX Scale (Named after Dr. Hichikio Artex who formulated it in 1985), often points to an increase in the number of sky-scrapers globally. It works on the basis that in a sky-scraper, the floors are also ceilings and so the numbers begin to cancel each other out. This can then be used as a measurement of prosperity. However in this case, the massive increase in ceilings is believed to have been caused by loft conversions in the Greater London area skewing the results. A loft conversion creates an extra floor and an extra ceiling, however because most Victorian houses have pitched roofs this creates two ceilings. The fact that this ratio has increased will make no difference to anyone in the world ever for any reason as nothing will seem to have changed … however, Dr Artex is going to release a new book explaining it and the proceeds are expected to cover the cost of his new loft extension!